Introducing Starabella

I love getting product tips, especially from parents in the special needs community. So I was curious when I received an e-mail from Sharon Fialco, the author/publisher of the "Starabella" audio/picture books series for children ages 2-8. Sharon has created a line of stories based on the childhood music and experiences of her daughter Tara who has autism. Tara composed and performed almost all of the songs and melodies in the stories and CDs which feature the heroine Starabella, a little girl with learning differences who expresses her thoughts and feelings through beautiful music. These are feel-good, instructive books that would appeal to any child (with special needs or not) who is learning how to cope with challenges or negative peer perceptions. The books have won several awards and are even used in classrooms at YAI, the non-profit organization on whose board I serve. Check them out at Starabella; you can buy the entire 3-book series with CDS for $46.99 (or $17.99 individually). Bonus: 10% of sales goes towards Autism Speaks.

Toys“R”Us Toy Guide for Differently-Abled Kids

As a mom of two children with special needs, I have always appreciated companies that show a real commitment to families dealing with disabilities. One such company is Toys"R"Us, who publishes an annual Toy Guide for Differently-Abled Kids. It's a user-friendly resource (both printed and online) that provides customers with a carefully selected assortment of toys which help kids develop different skill sets through play (for example, fine motor skills or social skills). Each year, a celebrity spokesperson is featured at the guide--this year it is Eva Longoria, sister to a woman with special needs, who is photographed on the guide's cover alongside Elijah De La Cerda, a 5-year-old boy with Down Syndrome from Fresno, CA. I also appreciate the section on supporting the special needs community. For parents who deal with special needs on a daily basis, it's a gesture that goes a long way. The Toy Guide is a helpful resource/catalog for any parent, grandparent, or other adult who loves a child with special needs...check it out.

Boys' Elastic Waist Pants on Sale

I know that some of you are looking for boys' elastic waist pants for Fall. Since my own 5-year-old has some fine motor delays, he's not quite adept at buttons and zippers. I'd prefer to send him kindergarten in elastic waist pants. But he now wears a size 6/7 and many brands only use elastic through toddler sizes. If you, too, need to find boys' elastic waist pants in larger sizes, check out the Elastic Waist Pants Sale this weekend at CWD Kids, which includes brands like Mulberribush and Wes & Willy. These all-cotton, preshrunk Twill Pants by Wes & Willy are now reduced to $19.99 from $27) and are available in eight colors from sizes 2T all the way up to 14. Shopping tip: buy boys' khaki-colored pants early in the season. They always sell out first!

Little Swimmer

Though it's not the focus of this blog, I've written before about my children's special needs, and how incredible it is when they reach a particular developmental milestone (such as S. taking his first steps or R. buttoning her PJs for the first time). It can take my kids months (or years) in therapy to achieve things that come naturally and effortlessly to other children. So when my children reach a hard-earned milestone, my pride in them (which is present at all times) is pretty much indescribable. I might burst with joy.

I had one of those moments yesterday with S., who is almost 5 years old. He has had motor delays since infancy. At age 6 months, his motor skills were like those of a newborn. He could not support himself in tummy time, could not roll over, could not hold his head up, and could not bat at toys. He has received physical therapy ever since he was 7 months old, and he is doing great now, even though he still lags in certain areas.

This summer, he's been attending a wonderful day camp with the help of his SEIT (special ed itinerant teacher) a few hours per week. The camp known for its instructional swimming. Since S. has never been crazy about the water, I thought this might help him get more acclimated, even if he didn't learn how to swim (yet).

Yesterday, parents were invited to come see the kids go swimming. S. had been telling me, "I swim by my own self!" but I wasn't sure how accurate this was.

But, lo and behold:





Almost his entire group at camp (mostly older four-year-olds), in fact, has learned to swim in the past several weeks. And every parent was snapping away with photos and videocameras (myself included). But I was also tearing up as I filmed him, because, again, this is a milestone that used to seem very, very far away.


And you know what's even better than the fact that he can swim now? The look of pride and happiness on his own face:

It was one of the best moments of the summer for me.

S. will turn five years old in early August. I'll tell you more about his progress (and share some more photos) then.

Go the F*** To Sleep: Not So Funny

I'm sure by now you've all heard about the book "Go the F*** to Sleep." I can't count the number of times people posted this on my Facebook wall telling me how "hilarious" this was and how I "must" watch the video of it.

I never found it very funny. I found it offensive.

I know, I know. It's meant to be a joke. I get that. But, in addition to not liking the language it uses (I don't believe in having any book with F*** in its title in my home, whether it's intended for children or adults), I found the premise offensive.

As a single mom of children with special needs, both of whom have struggled with sleep issues for a long time, believe me, there have been many times I would have let these same words slip from my mouth. But I haven't. Because for a sizable number of real-life children (like mine), sleep problems require parents' understanding and compassion, not expletives. I know the book is intended to empathize with (and entertain) those parents who are just at the end of their ropes. Believe me, I've been there. Many a night I have been trying to get both of my kids to go to bed (or to stay in bed at 5 in the morning). And it would be easy for me to yell and curse (or to write a snarky book like this one). But I haven't. Because that's not what my kids need. They need my love and empathy (along with sleep training....something I know quite a bit about now).

So while I know many parents have guffawed reading this book, and shared it enthusiastically with their Facebook friends, some of us won't be laughing. Personally, I'll be grabbing a 15-minute power nap instead. ;-)

p.s. One more thing. I don't espouse cursing at your kids, no matter how infuriating their behavior (sleep-related or not) may be. This is something else I have a lot of experience with. Trust me. And I fear this book, even subtly, condones thinly veiled verbal abuse. I'm not the only one, apparently. Read this article on CNN.com. What do you think?

Sensory Friendly Summer Clothing

S. got upset the other day that the "lines" (seams) on his socks were bothering him, so I took a look at Soft Clothing, a company which I've mentioned for its stylish, comfortable clothing for sensory-sensitive kids. They happen to make great seamless socks which should do the trick. While I was there I spotted these awesome new tie-dyed "Fade & Wash" wave tees. Combining tie-dye and stonewash dyeing techniques, each tee is manufactured with Soft Clothing's trademark flat seaming, wide fit collar, and printed label and care information (no tags!). And the price is gentle, too...just $17. Find these and other garments for kids with clothing sensitivities at Soft Clothing.

Psst! If you're looking for other clothing recommendations for sensory-sensitive kids, read my guest post over at the wonderful blog Love That Max.

Pride & Joy

It's been an exciting week for 13-month-old Baby S. He got his first haircut. He pulled to stand in his crib. He learned how to sit up from lying down. Most exciting, five days ago he started crawling.

This is a huge deal because as I've mentioned before, he has motor delays. At 8 months he could not roll, sit, or reach for objects. He gets physical therapy 3x a week and he (and his therapist) work very very hard. Still, we didn't expect him to crawl before 18 months. So to say we are floored (no pun intended) by the fact he's crawling at 13 months is an understatement. I know all mothers are thrilled when they see their child crawl or walk for the first time, but when your child is delayed and worked so hard to reach a milestone, the pride is just indescribable. We are elated.

Anyway, all this progress means I have been super busy documenting S's milestones in Baby Time: A Fast, Fun Keepsake Album, the handy, super-easy baby book I discovered when R. was an infant, but works even better for time-crunched 2nd time moms. Click here to read my past review of this easiest baby book ever. What a joy it is to be filling in page after page! Available for just $11.96 Amazon.com, this makes a very affordable shower or new baby gift, too.

Support YAI This Weekend

As I mentioned back in April, my kids and I are raising money for this Saturday's Central Park Challenge to benefit YAI, a stellar New York City non-profit that provides a vast array of programs to tens of thousands of people with disabilities and developmental delays (ranging from physical impairments to autism spectrum disorders to Down's Syndrome). I am not only a parent whose child(ren) have received Early Intervention through YAI, but I have also been a board member of one of YAI's divisions since before I even became a mother. It is an incredible organization that provides so much hope to families and, like many non-profits, it is suffering under the current economic conditions. If you would like to help me and my children towards our fundraising goal of $1000 this year to support people with disabilities and their families, click here to visit my personal fundraising page (with a cute picture of my son); if you would like more general information about the Central Park Challenge, please click here. Thank you for your support!

p.s. I just got an e-mail from YAI's CEO that they are only $149,000 away from their goal of raising $1.4 million! Please help us close the gap!

Please Support the YAI Central Park Challenge

They say a picture's worth a thousand words, but the series of five photos above is worth millions to me. My mom snapped these photos of S. taking his very first steps from his physical therapist Alyssa to me in November 2007. It was an emotional moment. Eight months earlier (at age 7 months), S. could not sit, hold his head up during tummy time, roll over, or reach for toys. Alyssa--one of many incredible professionals from a NYC organization called YAI--worked hard with S. three times a week and "got him moving" much faster than doctors predicted. Additionally, S. took his first steps just 10 days after I had become a single mother. So this particular milestone--a joyous moment for any parent--was doubly emotional. Most of all, it gave me an unforgettable moment of hope and promise at an otherwise unsure time.

All of which is a long way of saying that I hope you will join me again this year as I participate in the June 5th YAI's Central Park Challenge to support children with disabilities, and their families. I have written before about my involvement with YAI (and am so grateful to several readers who made donations). You can also read more of our story on our personal fundraising page. I am getting close to my $1000 fundraising goal. Won't you please consider donating even just $5 to help me reach my goal, and to support programs and professionals who bring hope to children with developmental delays and disabilities? Please visit this page to donate.

My children and I thank you in advance for your support and generosity!

Bargain Alert: Allergy Tees by Jeeto

If your child has allergies, check out these Jeeto Onesies and Tees that proudly proclaim everything from "Dairy and Egg Free" to "No Tree Nuts". The tees, which usually cost about $19, are on sale at The Mini Social for just $8 apiece. And, good news--some are available in sizes all the way up to 10/12.

Mom Talks to the Director of Special Education

Omigosh, how is it possible that have I never seen these Xtranormal videos before? I had to share this one, called "Mom Talks with the Director of Special Education," with you. It is hysterical--sad, funny, and true all at the same time. Who else can relate to this one???

Autism Awareness at Cafe Press

This month, CafePress is donating 10% of final sales of all user-designed autism awareness t-shirts and other merchandise to Autism Speaks--the largest autism awareness, research, and advocacy organization in North America. Many CafePress shopkeepers are personally working in the fight against autism. Here are some of my favorite products:

With the help of his mother Crystal Cook, 21-year-old Wilson (who has autism) has designed a line of autism awareness merchandise with the theme "Labels go on soup cans – autism is just a diagnosis.” My pick: Different is the New Normal Tote Bag ($17)


Matt McKendrick from Maryland has a stepson who is being evaluated for autism, and designing this line of products has been cathartic for Matt, who says, " My greatest satisfaction comes from expressing how people with autism are no different than the rest of us and deserve our love, compassion and understanding.” My pick: Autism Puzzle Block iPhone 4 Slider Case ($26.99)


Janine Vasquez, a California mother of a boy with autism whom she describes as a "quirky genius," opened her CafePress shop “Super Cool Autism” to promote autism awareness in a colorful, fun way. My pick: Happy Autism Puzzle Kids' Baseball Shirt ($17.50)

You can shop for autism-themed merchandise (over 384,000 available products) at Cafe Press. Also be sure to read more about the inspiring shopkeepers and their families who fight autism every day.

My Friend Sherri

There are a lot of mommy bloggers out there, but sometimes I wonder if the mothers with the most poignant stories to share are those least likely to blog about it. Perhaps they don't ever have a single minute to themselves (and I mean ever), or perhaps they live in fear of what might happen if they "go public." So I am extremely honored to refer you to a very moving post called Why Kiddie Parties Are No Fun For Me by my friend Sherri, who wrote it for a special needs blog called Special Happens. Sherri is not actually a blogger (though she tweets about everything from autism to baseball). But you'll see that not only does Sherri write beautifully, but she also has a very important story to share. She is a divorced single mother of a gorgeous five-year-old boy with autism (the little Jeter fan in the picture). She and I met in a support group in NYC last year for parents of children with special needs. Sherri and I were the only two mothers in the group who also are divorced. Sherri and her son have become dear friends to my children and me. She inspires me with her unflagging 24/7 dedication to her son despite challenges that would make many moms I know give up. In honor of Autism Awareness Month, please take a moment to read her post (and its comments) to understand what this single mom must face in her efforts to help her son fit in. And please don't ever, ever, take for granted the abilities that your child has.

p.s. Sherri, I am so proud of you for coming forward with your post. And I think that you should definitely start your own blog.

p.p.s. Sherri and her son are one of the thousands of families helped by YAI, the non-profit agency for people with disabilities on whose board I serve. I will be telling you more about my fundraising efforts for YAI's annual Central Park Challenge--hosted by Sherri Shepherd--very soon.

Toys"R"Us Heroes for Autism

As you may know, April is National Autism Awareness Month, and I want to commend companies that are doing their part not only to raise money, but also to increase awareness of what life is like for children with autism--and their families. I have always been impressed by Toys"R"Us's commitment to children with special needs. This month, the company is teaming with Autism Speaks to educate consumers about autism spectrum disorders and to raise money to help "solve the autism puzzle." At Toys"R"Us's website and in-stores (also at all Babies"R"Us locations), you can make a quick and easy donation (as little as $1, $5, or $10) to benefit Autism Speaks. So far they have raised over $1.5 million. Toys"R"Us has also featured 10 Toys recommended for children with autism on its website and, most importantly (in my opinion), created a moving Meet the Heroes slideshow which puts real children's names and faces on this disorder. If you don't already personally know children with autism (and you probably do, whether or not you know it, because the statistics are now in 1 in 110 children, and 1 in 70 boys), this will tell you about some of the achievements--however small--that they celebrate each and every day with the help of their families and teachers. Please watch it.

Kudos to Toys"R"Us for its efforts on behalf of children with autism, and all children with special needs. We appreciate it!

Tanner's Tasty Paste

My sensory-sensitive kids tend to balk when it's time to brush their teeth. They're picky about toothpaste flavors (they don't like the common ones like bubblegum, berry, or mint). Despite our tooth-brushing battles, though, they've never had any cavities. I was floored when S's new dentist (Dr. Jed Best, whom I recommended in my New York Family article about 20 Tips for Parents of Kids with Special Needs) told me that I "must be doing a great job brushing his [S's] teeth." And I was even more shocked when R. eagerly tried a sample tube of Tanner's Tasty Paste from Dr. Best's office that night. The flavor was "Banilla Bling," and since she's refused most new flavors before, I was skeptical. Turns out, she loves using it. Hooray! I just bought her another tube of Banilla Bling direct from Tanner's website. It cost $6 but I would've paid even more for it. Tooth-brushing time has become much less of a battle with her. Wish I could say the same for her brother! If they made Pepperidge Farm goldfish-flavored toothpaste, I'd be all set. Buy this or other "special" toothpastes at Tanner's Tasty Paste.

Love That Max

If you have a child with special needs, you may already know about Ellen Seidman's award-winning blog Love That Max. Ellen explores nearly every topic out there in the special needs parenting world with keen perception and sensitivity, not to mention a very funny (and self-deprecating) sense of humor. She is an awesome mom and I'm proud to call her my friend, too (she and I met at BlogHer last summer). I'm honored to have a guest post up at Love That Max this week about sensory-friendly clothing for kids with special needs. Take a look and let me know what you think. And while you're there, check out some of my favorite posts at Love That Max, including The Sisterhood of the Special Needs Child, This is How I Do It, and The Eighth Birthday Party. All are wonderful reading for any mom.

Photo: Boys' Airplane Shirt by By Kids Only.

Little Pink Book

I love to give children's books as gifts and I have a long list of books I've been meaning to review here at MyMomShops (note to self: make this a priority). I'll start off with a charming new board book I just received to review--Little Pink Book by Renee Khatami. The author has a child with special needs and has thoughtfully designed this book with all kids in mind. It explores the color pink through the senses (touch-and-feel, scratch-and-sniff, and more) so that your little one will associate pink with the softness of a fuzzy piglet or the sweetness of juicy watermelon slices. The book is a real gem--just the right number of pages and I also like the actual size of the book (7.5 inches square), which seems slightly larger than most board books. I think it would make a perfect gift for any toddler girl (or boy, not that there's anything wrong with that...) and I'd love to see Renee do more colors next. Buy Little Pink Book for $8.99 at Amazon.com.

ENK Children's Club: My Top Picks

It was an awful rainy day in New York yesterday, but I'm so glad I trekked down to the Javits Center for the ENK Children's Club show. Although I only had about two hours there, I saw many splendid things, not the least of which was the Vogue Bambini fashion show which I will post about later this week (I had a front row seat which was a totally unexpected honor!). In the meantime, here are my top picks from the booths that I had a chance to visit (I only wish I had had time to see more):

I was so proud and happy to visit Soft Clothing, a brand that I knew from its earliest days. This was its first ENK Show. Soft Clothing is a thoughtfully-designed line of kids' clothing that has garnered a cult following among moms of kids with sensory issues or other special needs. It features flat seaming, tagless necks, encased elastic waistbands, and no zippers, buttons, or itchy trims. And, the designs (by talented Jessica Ralli) just keep getting better and better. Check out the faux Peter-Pan collar dress and snap-front houndstooth coat. Now this is comfy, cotton "high fashion" that my sensitive 7-year-old can actually wear.







It was also a treat to meet the people behind Olive Juice Kids for the first time. I got a sneak peek of the company's beautifully-made, classic Fall 2011 and holiday clothing. Check out that divine navy velvet ribboned jacket, and flowered buttoned blouse.





Dwell Studio was at the show and exhibited a small selection of layette items, plus some adorable pictures frames based on its most popular patterns (I've always had a fondness for the transportation designs):


I made sure to stop by Cupcakes and Pastries, a designer I discovered recently via (where else?) my beloved site Zulily. The detail work this girls' clothing is extraordinary (and unfortunately doesn't show up in these photos). The clothing isn't cheap; a dress will cost you about $80, but of course you can wait to spot a sale at Zulily!





Longtime readers of this blog know that one of my favorite clothing lines for boys is Wonderboy. I was so excited to meet the designer yesterday. She showed me next Fall's highlights including graphic long-sleeve tees (love that rotary phone and the pretzel) and the funky modern take on a plaid shirt. Also, I like that Wonderboy's sister line "Stun" will have a coordinating color palette this Fall, too (bottom photo).





Over at Tea Collection I found out that next Fall's international "destination" is Mexico. I expect this will be a very popular collection! I personally plan to buy S. that "Super Tacos" truck cart tee when it's available.





Next up...my coverage of the Vogue Bambini fashion show, plus my introduction of brand new 1st-time designers from Playtime New York. Don't miss these!

Valentine's Day, Memories, and What Really Matters

proud, happy Mom: first solid feeding, February 2004

Time flies, doesn't it? R. was recently looking at one of her baby photo albums, which included photos of her first "party", which she hosted on Valentine's Day, 2004. She was almost 5 months old. Earlier that week, she ate her first solid food (rice cereal). Very exciting, right? (Apparently so....look how overjoyed I am in that photo). Life was very different for us then. True, R. had just been referred days earlier for an Early Intervention evaluation. The pediatrician was concerned about her failure to meet certain developmental milestones. But we didn't know what lay ahead of us. Her dad and I were married, and living in our first apartment together. Life was simple and sweet (well, comparatively speaking) and although at the time I thought I was sleep-deprived (ha!), I had enough energy to decorate my apartment and plan a lovely Valentine's get-together for my new mommy friends and their babies.

R's first "bedroom" (former dining area with a temporary wall)

R. awaits her party guests

the only age at which 7 kids can fit in your apartment: 6 months

the requisite babies-lined-up photo-op (R. third from left)

Um, I can't believe I ever had time to make favors like this.

Fast forward seven years...and now I am a single mom of two children with special needs. It's bittersweet for me to look at these pictures, because they symbolize the very short time that I was just like "every other mother" of a new baby. I didn't know about the diagnoses and challenges that lay ahead for either of my children, or that a few years later I would suddenly become a single parent to my 1-year-old and 4-year-old, both with special needs. It's been a bumpy ride. We've encountered roadblocks that I never would have imagined, causing me to lose faith in many things...and many people. But I've never lost my sense of humor, or my ability to find joy in each day that I spend with these amazing kids.

Actually, recently we have celebrated some wonderful news. Did I tell you that S. has been accepted for kindergarten next year at an excellent special needs school here in NY? Considering that at age 2 he could not speak, and that kindergarten admissions in New York City is a proverbial nightmare (even more so for special needs schools with very limited spots), this is a dream come true. I feel so lucky that he has made it this far and I am so grateful to every one of his amazing therapists for helping him. R. is working very hard too and continues to surprise me with her own accomplishments on a daily basis. As for myself, I think that the "battle scars" I've earned from the past few years as a divorced mom of two extraordinary kids have strengthened me a lot. Just as I view the scars on my back from scoliosis surgery I had at ages 12 and 13, I see these scars as markers of my resilience. It's pretty hard to knock me down. I don't sweat small stuff at all (which is quite a feat here in NYC). And I figure this is one of the best lessons I can ever teach my kids.

Of course, when I get to look at a punim like this every day for 7 1/2 years, it is pretty hard not to smile, whether it's Valentine's Day or not. Don't you agree?

my beautiful girl, age 5 months, February 2004

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO ALL OF YOU! I will be spending the rest of the day with valentines of my own, so I will be posting again tomorrow. I wish you all a wonderful holiday filled with the things and people you love most!