Let's Talk - giving you the hand

There are a number of body language cues we pick up to decide how we feel about someone during a first meeting. I'm not a sociologist or any other ist that has studied said cues. However, I have a few things that I feel strongly about when initially meeting someone new. One is the handshake. When someone gives me their hand, I don't necessarily analyze the physical appearance of it. I'd like to think I don't judge too much as my hands aren't exactly sexy. At any rate, I'm busy making eye contact, as I was taught. And what I really pay attention to is the grip of the handshake.

I've gone the way of my mother with germ phobia and try not to shake many hands these days, but sometimes it's unavoidable. Sometimes it's completely necessary. Like with the guys my sister brings around. Many of them don't say much. I suspect it's because my and my mother's rumored reputation for being tough on her dating choices precedes us. Because they usually don't do a lot of talking, I try to glean what I can from attire and handshake. I do my best to not be judgmental. However, I definitely size people up in a more stringent way if they're spending time with my sister. And my nephews are a huge consideration. I don't want them spending time with any chumps. When I've met some of her "friends," they use only their fingers to gently hold the tips of mine and give a gentle pump...maybe two pumps, if they're particularly trying to make an impression? (slaps knee) There's no palm-to-palm shake; no shake like I was taught to make. Impression? Poor. My favorite (not), was the guy who had a soft, high voice to match. Both his weak handshake and voice foreshadowed how weak he'd be in a relationship. His actions matched his physicality. Now before you think I'm being hypercritical or tell me that a man should shake a woman's hand in a different way, you should know that almost every one of these guys that has given a weak handshake to me and/or my mom has also done that to my husband. Boooo! A man cannot shake another man's hand in a weak way without getting some criticism, at least behind closed doors. G Money & I have talked about this topic a few times and last nite we discussed & demonstrated handshakes to each other. We came up with a number of handshakes and how we'd interpret them as a woman or man. It was pretty funny. In particular, he stressed the importance of shaking my dad's hand in the right way when they first met. Lucky for my sister, my dad hasn't met any of her friends in recent years. He wouldn't be impressed. At all.

What do you think about the ways people give you the hand, for a handshake that is. As a woman, do you shake another woman's hand in a very soft way? Or does it depend on whether it's personal vs professional? How about if you meet a man? How do you interpret or judge the handshake? Again, does it depend on whether it's personal or professional? Or have you ever even given it a thought?

Oh, do chime in.

♥